USELESS WANKER: Lee Harding
Lets get one thing clear. I am a punk at heart. I cut my teeth as a young boy on The Sex Pistols, The Clash, The Dead Kennedys and Black Flag to name but a few. I even had some time for 'pop-punk' bands like The Buzzcocks And The Descendants.
These days Punk has become a bit of a joke, but at least bands like Greenday and The Living End try to get some kind of social message across (albeit usually misguided ones).
This dancing monkey is Lee Harding. He thinks he is a punk. He takes his influences from bands like Good Charlotte and Blink 182 (both bands in my opinion need to fed into a large garden mulcher onstage and thrown at their audiences). The main difference between Lee and G.C./182 is they can play instruments, and sing. Lee can't. He sucks ass.
Good old Lee was a finalist in the abhorrent 'Australian Idol' show. I suspect the main reason he got that far was because the mighty TSSH webpage ran a campaign to try to get as many votes for this no-talent gerbil as possible in an attempt to destroy the show by producing a winner that had the marketability of a home caustic soda enema kit.
Sadly their plan failed, in two ways. He didn't win, and he still has a music career for now.
This guy has a song out called 'Wasabi'. That's quite interesting because if his music was food, it would be far from sushi, it would be more like a boiled sweet laced with cats urine.
I sincerely hope that his 15 minutes of fame evaporates quickly, then he can get back to his job at the grocery store. This time cannot be far off, as one of his salivating fat-chick fans recently exposed the fact that he lugs his own gear into shows.
I suppose when all you need is a radio mike, a dat machine and an effects processor with pitch correction (an Eventide Ultra-harmonizer would peg that pitchy voice down nicely), I guess you don't need roadies you can't afford to pay for anyway.
I also hope he realizes he will need a decent disguise to intergrate back into real life (I suggest a brick to the teeth) , as there will be an army of punks, skins, homies and assorted street scum who would love to beat him to a bloody pulp, and stuff his anus with wasabi. You can't spraypaint a dog turd, push a couple of studs into it an call it a punk rock.
In fact I would love to pluck a group of these young 'punks' that are around now and drop them into the middle of one of the rough punk gigs I went to when I was young, say P.I.L at Easts' Leagues Club, or Iggy at the Horden in 89. Just to see how punk they really are. The poor plastic punklings would have been stripped naked and crowd surfed into the nearest rubbish bin!
Best of luck Lee, hope you get plenty of jailbait vaginal juices humped onto your leg for the next 200 non paid appearances then get the fack out of my face, you no-talent piece of shit.
And to all his fans, hurry up and become fat suburban wage-slaves, you guys are nothing but subcultural sewage!